I have neglected you, dear blog — and for that I am sorry. I have been writing elsewhere, a real journal. Not that you are unreal, artificial, or fake… no no, not at all. Just… different…
I think that when I started this I was able to place more of myself here and leave true content. Where now… I have tried to write many times, to create a post that would help to represent who I am and who I want to be and all those things — but life is not like that. It is not always so idyllic and rosy. Life is life and in its very essence is a messy and muddled and continuous thing.
So tired trying to see from behind the red in my eyes,
No better version of me I could pretend to be tonight.
So deep in this swill with the most familiar of swine
For reasons wretched and divine.
She blows outta nowhere, roman candle of the wild
Laughing away through my feeble disguise
No other version of me I would rather be tonight.
And, Lord, she found me just in time
She’s gonna save me,
Call me “baby”
Run her hands through my hair
She’ll know me crazy,
Soothe me daily
Better yet she wouldn’t care
I hope to god I’ll love you harder
I hope to god I’ll love you longer
If only I could live forever
If only I could hold you longer
Well I hope to god I’ll love you harder
I hope to god I’ll love you longer
If only I could live forever
If only I could hold you longer
Coleman Hell – 2 Heads

One year ago today we decided to date. Well, I guess we didn’t really decide on this day in particular, but it is the one year mark of our first date. It wasn’t until about two and half weeks later when I went to visit him that we had the “what are we” talk. The talk was initiated by me because I wanted to keep up the visiting and the hanging out and the being together-ness that had really begun that few weeks earlier. So I asked if we were going to keep going with all that. He said, “I hope so. I want to.”
And here we are, one year later. Happily dating, yet unhappily doing so long distance — but I’d rather be apart together than apart separate. July 5th seemed like a great day for a first date which means it will always be a great day for us to celebrate together-ness, even if we are apart.
Give me a soft subtle mix
And if ain’t broke then don’t try to fix it
And think of the summers of the past
Adjust the base and let the alpine blast
Pop in my CD and let me run a rhyme
And put your car on cruise and lay back cause it’s the summertime
Summertime – DJ Jazzy Jeff & The Fresh Prince
A stranger in an airport once told me that I had a great smile because it reached all the way to my eyes. That is the best compliment I have received. 
Have you ever received a compliment that changed your day, perspective, or mood? Wanna share it? Write a comment!
Also, as I was writing the title of this post, I became confused… should I use “a while” or “awhile”? What is the difference? Is there a difference? Turns out, that yes, there is a difference although it is small. Here is what I found with a quick google search:
Thanks to this great link :)